Awesome - Woman Finds Out Tinder Date Lied, So She Takes Matters Into Her Own Hands
Scrolling through her feed and feeling the afterglow from their chat last night, she saw his name pop up as a friend that Facebook had suggested for her. With her heart fluttering, she opened his profile. Immediately, she saw a post on his page that made the world stop. The realization slowly hit her -- the relationship had been one big lie.
Ready To Move On
Kimberly Anne from Palm Beach County, Florida, had finally decided that it was time to move on. She had been single for a while now and was ready to start dating again. But where could she meet that special someone? She didn’t go to bars, and the dates her friends had set up for her had been disastrous. But little did she know, all the bad dates she’d ever gone on would pale in comparison to this.
The Dating Minefield
Kimberly knew that dating in the modern era -- especially when you’re in your thirties -- can be a daunting challenge. But, after her friends suggested that she try the popular dating app, Tinder, she decided to give it a shot. She had heard the Tinder horror stories firsthand, so, naturally, she was apprehensive at first. But later, her anxiety would be completely justified…
Taking The Plunge
One evening, Kimberly took the plunge. She downloaded the app and created her profile. She carefully deliberated over her introduction, re-writing it three times -- she had to get it just right. Then, with shaking fingers, she hit save and sent herself out into the world. With the hard part done, she began to look through the profiles that had been selected for her. Now, for the next step.
Not A Promising Start
After swiping left a few times, Kimberly was beginning to lose hope. From reading the profiles, she saw that most of the men were looking for something casual. She wasn’t looking for a casual relationship, she was looking for love. Disappointed, she wondered if she had made a mistake. Then, she saw him.
Alex
His name was Alex. He was a little older than her and lived closeby. And, as a bonus, he was an attractive guy. She read his profile and saw that he was looking for “someone special,” like her! With butterflies in her sAlexach, she whispered: “…well, here goes nothing.” She took a deep breath and swiped right. Now, all she could do was wait. Would he like her, too?
A Match!
Almost immediately, she got a notification. They were a match! The pair quickly got to chatting. “I asked him what he was looking for and he asked me the same question and I told him that I was hoping to find my special someone,” Kimberly recalls, “and he responded with “I love that”. Everything was going so smoothly! Kimberly could hardly believe it. Little did she know, there was a nasty surprise waiting for her.
Hitting It Off
Alex and Kimberly chatted into the early hours of the morning. They had many shared interests, and Alex seemed like a stand-up guy. She loved that he was upfront about wanting a long-term relationship. Could this be it? She dared to wonder… was Alex the one? But things were about to take a strange turn…
Something Feels Off
The next morning, there was a message waiting from Alex on Whatsapp. That’s odd, Kimberly thought. “He sent me a message on Whatsapp and I asked him why he was messaging me on there instead of just sending a regular text,” she explained, “…and he just changed the subject.” But when she logged onto Facebook, she saw something that raised all the red flags.
On Facebook
Kimberly scrolled through her feed and saw Alex pop up as a suggested friend on Facebook. Curious to get to know the man she had been chatting to a little better, she opened his profile. But there was a post on his timeline that set off alarm bells in her head. She couldn’t believe what she was seeing!
He'd Lied
“I thought I’d take a look and the first thing I noticed was that it said he was in a relationship,” she said in an interview. Kimberly was incredulous! Her heart sank deeper and deeper as the truth finally hit her. “Hoping it was old I clicked on her profile and the first post was an engagement announcement from exactly one month ago.” After the sadness began to wear off, Kimberly was furious!
She Was Livid
Alex had been lying to her right from the beginning. Kimberly thought carefully about what she would do next. Then, the feeling of anger slowly faded and a feeling of calmness washed over her. She was going to make Alex pay for this. She had to confront him. But how would he react now that his dirty little secret was out?
Confrontation
“My first emotion was just complete shock, I could not believe it – I was just flabbergasted,” Kimberly said. “I wasn’t seriously emotionally invested yet, but I was angry on her behalf that he would do this to her.” “Yo. Facebook just suggested you as my friend,” she typed. “You just got engaged?!” But Alex’s response was so audacious that it had her seeing red. That's when she decided to go a step further.
He Denied Everything
“Wrong person honey,” Alex cooly replied. He was completely denying the accusation. And he even had the gall to say that the Facebook profile didn’t belong to him! Kimberly recalls: “I looked again at his Facebook pictures and compared a tattoo on his arm to the pictures on his Tinder profile and it was the exact same tattoo…” Well, she’d given him a chance to come clean. Now, it was time for revenge.
Getting Even
She clicked on the post that contained the photos of Alex and his fiancé and went onto the woman’s profile. “I just felt if the tables were turned I would want her [his fiancé] to tell me. I feel women have to support women in these situations – we have to have each other’s backs,” she explained. Then, she typed out a message to Alex’s fiancé.
Sharing Screenshots
Kimberly shared screenshots of all their conversations. “My whole body was shaking when I was sending these messages because I didn’t know how she was going to react,” she said. “I felt so awful and partially responsible that I could potentially be breaking this woman’s heart.” She ended her message with: “…do what you will with this information, I would want to know if it was me.” How would the woman respond?
Her Response
“It’s ok it’s not your fault, thanks,” Alex’s fiancé wrote. Then Kimberly blocked Alex and unmatched with him on Tinder. “I was afraid that there would be some sort of backlash – I didn’t want to be harassed by him,” she said. She was shocked by the woman’s response. After telling her that her fiancé was chatting with other women on Tinder, Why didn’t she seem angry?
She Didn't Seem Surprised
“Her response was so calm and minimal that I don’t know if she was in shock, or maybe this was something that had happened before and she wasn’t really surprised by it,” Kimberly said. “I’m afraid that she has decided to forgive him, but that’s her choice if that’s what she wanted to do.”
Covering His Tracks
“Personally I would have ended the engagement immediately, but maybe she was more understanding than I would have been, Kimberly said. “Later in the day I looked at his profile and saw he had changed his profile picture to one of him and his fiancé together hugging. Maybe that was his way of saying that it won’t happen again through telling everyone he’s totally in love with her.”
A Viral Story
Kimberly decided to share her story on Facebook and was ‘saddened’ by the sheer number of responses she received from women who have had similar experiences. Kimberly said: “I want to believe that this is not something that is common. I’ve been single for eight months and ultimately want to find my special person – I would like my next relationship to be my last. I have to be very careful going forward about what questions I ask and really assess the way they’re answering those and continue to see if I can find anything about them online before I get too invested.”
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